Intentional Relationships

Over the last two weeks I have led two funeral services. Janette and Elaine both passed away and went to their heavenly home. As Christians, and for these Christian ladies, this is truly something to celebrate. My calling as a pastor is to care for the family, relay to them what I know about their loved one, and help them see the hope found in Jesus during this time of mourning. The visits I made to their loved one before his/her death allowed one-on-one time with the person. Most of those visits are never fully understood by the family until the funeral. It is at the funeral that I get the opportunity to share the stories and memories I have made with their loved one.

If I am truly honest with myself, I never realize at the time how powerful those visits are either. Visits go from being work to watching the power of the Holy Spirit. What I mean by that is, before I go on a visit, I have to make sure I have my communion kit full, that it is the right time for me to visit considering the person’s needs and schedule, and that I would have the right amount of time to stay and talk. Once I enter the room, the intentional relationship begins. My art of small talk learned in the south on vicarage takes over, until eventually we cross into the deeper pieces and stories about his or her life. It is over several visits that the relationship is built. Then, as I’m preparing for the funeral after he or she has gone to be with Jesus, I watch how the Holy Spirit brings all of those visits together to share how the love of Jesus was shown in the life of that person in unique and special ways. Those are stories of comfort to a mourning family.

The interesting thing is that I even get to see the intentional relationships built by the deceased with the family and friends. I hear stories of how he or she impacted the lives of others. Many times, it gives me a clearer picture of who that person really was. Since I love relationships and people, I love this part. I always leave a funeral a little saddened remembering the last great visit I had with that person before he or she went to heaven. I have an image in my mind of the room or hospital where we met, and the stories shared, but then I remember that I won’t get to go there and see that person again. It is a sad moment, but I hold onto two powerful things: First and foremost, that person is in heaven! Secondly, I am thankful for the time I had with him or her, though I will always wish I could have had more. I thought this would go away the longer I was at Mt. Calvary and with more visits that I did, but I don’t think it ever will.  The reality is there is never enough time, and I will always want more time to visit.

Intentional relationships, this is what we will spend time talking about this weekend. What are intentional relationships? How is that a value of Mt. Calvary? How do we as members, and as Christians, go about nurturing those relationships?