You want me to manage what? My Money

Not only is it tough to talk about money in the church, but really in any situation. There is just something touchy about the subject in general. We all have guilt about some places where we spend money that others don’t. We all have places where we make cuts that others don’t. No one else truly knows our money situation. We make decisions regarding money everyday, but yet we know our financial position can change at any moment. Remember back to week one when we talked about the body? A sudden crazy disease could change our financial situation overnight, and every financial principal we have would be sacrificed to save our loved one. Just like with the body, there are ways the world has influenced us to think about money. This week we ask, “How does God want me to think about money?”

My parents set a good foundation for me about giving to God. I knew giving was important. Once I set it as a practice in my life, it became natural. I remember being excited after confirmation to get offering envelopes. I felt like I was truly an adult. Once the money went in the plate, it quickly moved out of my mind. I don’t even remember filling out most of the checks. Sure, I had questions about giving when it came to birthday money or graduation gifts. That was probably the biggest challenge for me to figure out. But then a new challenge came that I never anticipated. I knew growing up that the giving I was doing was helping to pay the pastor.  Well, now I was a pastor.

Somewhere along the way, giving had gotten more complex than it was when I was young. Everybody has bills, and everybody’s mind is getting slammed with excuses not to give. We all have stories, pastor or not, why someone else should give. You may think it is a no brainer that pastors give to their church, but as graduation and ordination day comes closer for Seminary guys, many are asking where should they give. This is a big question even for our fieldworkers (when they are brave enough to ask). In Seminary it is easy to claim to be a poor student, or that you have too much debt to pay down. But some guys raise the question, should I give to my fieldwork congregation or send it to my home congregation? On vicarage, students really don’t make that much, so then they ask if they should be giving it back to the same church that is paying them? As I entered my first couple churches as a youth pastor, where youth budgets are tight, it seemed to make sense to pay for youth expenses out of my own money, consider it offering, and just say I’ll figure it out at the end of the month. Yet, I always felt uneasy about this. During a conversation with some of my co-workers, they said something powerful, “I think you just pray about it, set your giving, and trust God.”

There are all kinds of fears in this world about running out of money. There are fears of how to prepare for retirement. There are fears about how to pay for weddings and college. There are pressures by commercials to live up to some American dream. This week our text is one of the most misquoted passages in all of Scripture. Yet Scripture is clear, “the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil.” It isn’t money that is all kinds of evil, it is the love of money. This is an important distinction because it affects our mindset. If money is the root of all kinds of evil, but we still have to use money, we don’t know what to do or how to handle it. We can easily write it off saying, “I guess Scripture didn’t know we were going to need to use money.” But that’s not true, so having a clear distinction between money and the love of money is important.  Do you have a love of money? Can you part with it, or is it a passionate focus for you? This week we take time to ask what roadblocks are in our way when we talk about money and giving. We pray that God would lead us to be givers who trust Jesus will provide, and see the joy in giving.

You want me to manage what? My Family

“For if a man know not how to rule his own house, how shall he take care of the church of God?” 1 Timothy 3:5

Jacob had a buddy spend the night last Friday. We let them have some freedoms we wouldn’t normally give our children. Those two got to stay up and watch TV longer than the others. Then they were up at 2:30am talking, and again a few hours later playing video games. I was exhausted Saturday morning from dealing with the mayhem during the night. We had said that we would take the friend home at noon, but that still meant providing breakfast, so I drug my body to the kitchen to make waffles. Being a parent is never easy. There is always something else to handle, and a constant conviction on how to be a parent.

When we took the friend home, we could tell how tired Jacob was. We told him he was going to have to take a nap. He fought with us about it, but as lunch finished, he asked to head upstairs to lie down.  When I came upstairs and looked for him, he wasn’t in his bed. Instead I found him fast asleep in my bed. When Jacob woke up, we talked about what happened and why he was so tired. I said, “What lesson did you learn?” He said, “Don’t have friends spend the night!” I said, “That’s not it. What else?” He said, “Staying up is not good.” I said, “That’s not it, but you are getting closer.” He said, “I don’t know.” I said, “Sleep is important!”

I told Jacob the story of the first time I spent the night at a friend’s house and stayed up all night. I was probably in the fifth grade, and we had a skating party the next day. I didn’t get home until 4pm the next afternoon. When I got home I found the first room available at the top of the steps (which was my sister’s) and I fell sleep. I slept from 4pm to 7am the next day! Those lessons I learned as a kid help me be a father, but the important part is imparting the lessons to my kids.

Life is busy. With so many distractions, leading our households can be tough. That is why this passage is so powerful. Paul was not just talking to Timothy, or to the elders, but to so many of us as well. Our selfish side wants to check out after work. We feel the busyness of life and just want our homes to be a place to chill. But the truth is, so much is needed to lead a household.

A buddy of mine told me a story about a guy I think is a really great gift to ministry. He is a grandpa now. One day his son and grandchild were over, and the grandpa was on his iPad. The son finally looked at his dad and told him to get off his iPad while his grandson was there.  He had to remind his dad to take advantage of the opportunity to play with grandson and to build that relationship with him. Now, that may not be how your household works, but the point is simple—it can happen it anyone. Even a guy I respect in ministry is getting called out for being disengaged as a grandpa.

It is hard to lead our households. It is hard to be engaged as a parent, grandparent, or uncle/aunt. It shows us just how great our Father in heaven is, since He is willing to listen and engage with us at any minute. Jesus is very in tune with every need we have.

I love that Jacob fell asleep in my bed. It gives me a great picture of how we can be. Jacob got tired of managing in his own life. He didn’t even go to his bed, he went straight to my bed. It was his sweet surrender, like he was saying, “Dad, I am tired of managing my own life. Can I just lay in your bed for awhile.” Oh the number of times I have felt this as a human. I just need to lay in my Heavenly Father’s bed for awhile. I just need the weight of everything I thought I could manage to be taken away.

We hit close to home when we talk about managing family and being good stewards of it. It is something we do every day of our life, no matter the size or stage of our family. When we come home to God’s house, we see how God manages His family. It is a beautiful picture – the way He welcomes, loves and forgives. Today we reflect on the challenges in managing family, but also rejoice how God can rejuvenate and renovate us so that we are prepared to lead the family He has blessed us with.

You want me to manage what? My Body

I was with someone this weekend that was complaining about his health insurance. Shocking, right? This person was complaining that he is 26 years old and has to go off of his parents’ insurance plan. He talked about how he was healthy, but now he was personally paying for others who are sick. Let me just stop the story right there and say a few things. First, how do we know we are healthy? Second, how do we keep our bodies healthy so we don’t turn into sick people cranking up the insurance rates? And finally, what do we do when something new is on our plate to manage?

Now, before you think I am judging this person, let me just be clear. I find that all too often we think we know how to handle some of the most important aspects of life. I have mentioned before how almost every wedding couple that comes to me to get married thinks they know how to create a good marriage. And there are many people who think they know how to raise kids. We think we know how to manage our health. We think we know how to manage our finances.  How many of us study any of this in school or college? (All the finance managers out there – before you think that you’ve got the finances down, remember we are talking about personal finances.) Our churches have started putting out materials and giving classes on finances because we realize that if our members aren’t healthy financially, they won’t be giving to the church. But isn’t that true about the rest of the areas as well? If our members don’t have healthy marriages, families, and bodies, how can they be ready to serve when needed? If they are hurting, how can they serve their community, and help others see why they need Jesus?

We quickly get nervous when the church starts talking about stewardship, because we know they are eventually going to talk about money. And make no mistake, the church is going to talk about money when they talk about stewardship. But, isn’t if better if the church talks about all areas we manage in our lives? If so, why don’t they?

For me, preaching on money is not fun. Hopefully, this doesn’t come as a shock to you, but most pastors are in their profession because they love people. Yet talking about money has the potential to make the people they love mad. So to me the answer is simple – rip it off like a Band-aid; just do it and get it over with. As a youth pastor, I was so glad when someone else talked about money, but I also had to live with his decision. If he thought my youth program could raise $60,000, then I had to do it. This is the good and bad of someone else managing this area. Generally speaking, pastors don’t like dealing with this.

All throughout Scripture we see that God is constantly trying to lead His people into a deep understanding of the blessings they have, and to see them as blessings rather than burdens. The truth is, my friend who was complaining about managing his health insurance has a great point. Who really wants to do this? Sometimes I look into the life of my 7-month old and think, “Wow, she has got it good.” She is surrounded by people who love her. She cries and someone picks her up. She doesn’t have to worry about clothes, food, or bills. She has a charming life.  I realize not every baby has a charming life. If that baby’s parents are mismanaging their lives, the baby’s life could be pretty rough, simply because the parents don’t see the blessing God has given them.

This series is called, “You want me to manage what???” All of us can have that reaction when we think about the many things in life God has called us to manage. We will talk about how God has gifted us with blessings, yet those blessings still require responsibility and oversight. Our texts will come from the book of Timothy, a book where Paul was trying to help Timothy with instructions for the blessings he got to manage. We take those instructions and ask ourselves, “What is God telling me?” We begin today with health and ask how our bodies can be a blessing and not a burden.

What if Reformation Day never happened?

Waking up is one of the oddest feelings in the world. Our mind is still working while we are sleeping, but our state of consciousness is gone, so waking up is a re-acclimation with our current state of reality. This can be positive if the night and days leading up to that moment were positive, or negative if your days and hours have been full of challenging moments. I hardly pondered this when I was younger, but as an adult who has responsibilities to handle every day, it is a common thought. I wake up and first take inventory of my behaviors, problems, and most demanding jobs. Yet no matter my current state of affairs, I am relieved of all my burdens because of the Reformation and All Saints Day. I know, you’re probably thinking I’m a crazy pastor because I think of the church year with such importance, but hear me out.

As a church body, we have let the church year and its importance fall off the map because we quit explaining its relevance. In nine and a half years of being a pastor in a conservative denomination, I have come to this conclusion: I want to explain it more. I want to practically proclaim how the traditions of the church are relevant still today.

Let me take us back to the time of the Reformation, and let’s snatch Luther out of the picture to see how 2016 might look if the Reformation didn’t happen, and how that would affect All Saints Day. – Zap. Luther & the reformation never happened. — Now jump ahead to 2016 – I’m in my bed, waking up after a night of sleep. Getting my consciousness about me again, I take inventory of my behaviors, problems, and most demanding jobs, and I’m miserably disappointed. I have always been hard on myself, but now I have little or no relief. I begin my morning routine anxiously awaiting confession. I head to Mt. Calvary Catholic Church and I confess my sins and failures to another priest. I leave, paying my indulgences and praying that my family will make it out of purgatory and into heaven. I’m still unsettled, but I have to carry on.  Occasionally my thoughts drift, and I realize I’m trying to convince myself that I am a faithful man of God. But it’s easy to see that I’m just lying to myself, so I fall back into my prison of sin, saving every penny to buy indulgences and waiting for the opportunity to confess my sins again so I can feel a brief moment of release.

Now comes my “Back to the Future” moment, where Marty enters the reality of Biff taking the almanac and changing his entire world.  If you are not a “Back to the Future” person, it is like the United States without Independence Day. It is the United States without the freedoms we enjoy.  As you look back at the 2016 morning described above, you might think that it is far fetched. Surely the Reformation didn’t really change all of that? Yes it did!

The church had once stolen the freedom that Christ came to give. It had put people back in the bondage of sin, and the plague of never feeling forgiven. It changed how people see the saints; the faithfully departed were still in their sins even after death. If left that way, All Saints Day would not be a celebration, but another burden. We would be trying to free our ancestors from the consequences of what they had done. But, in our current reality, Reformation and All Saints Day speak of the freedom Christ came to give, and the promise of true freedom in heaven!

Now, because of the Reformation, I can wake up, inventory the previous days events and hear the Holy Spirit speak, “You are forgiven and you are mine!” With that assurance, I am able to quickly move to the vocations God would have me do with the gifts He has given. I quietly celebrate with those who have died, that they no longer take inventory of anything, and I wait upon the day when my consciousness will have no sin, pain, or sorrow.

So why don’t we talk about the Reformation and All Saints Day? Honestly, I think we have just assumed that our current generation could care less about church history, rather than speaking to its relevance in our current culture. In my personal mission statement, I debated long and hard about referring to Scripture as ancient words. My coach even challenged me on it. I think too often we think of celebrations like this weekend as ancient, and at times, we even think of Scripture that way too. But if we adopt that point of view, we miss the hope, promise and freedom they give to our current reality.

Reformation and All Saints Day are pinnacle celebrations in the church year. They speak of the freedom we have in Christ. They speak what Jesus has done for us, and they proclaim to our sin burdened lives that we are free because of the work of Jesus. They remind our burdened conscience that one day we will no longer wake up taking inventory of our sins, but rejoicing with all the Saints.

Discipleship Go: Pray 1

Friday night was lasagna night at my house. I am not a huge fan of making lasagna just because of the time it takes. I know some of you might be thinking, “But you like cooking?” Yes I do, but to me lasagna is basically spaghetti with cottage cheese. (Sorry ricotta lovers. I’m still old school, the way my mom made it.) You have the sauce, meat, and noodles, and then you bake it. It lengthens the process of a basic meal. It is not that I am opposed to lasagna, but rather the work involved to make something that I could do in less time. I make a baked spaghetti dish to use spaghetti leftovers, and it is basically the same thing. My kids have recently been watching Garfield, so they have been curious about lasagna. (Lasagna is Garfield’s favorite food.) They’ve had it before, but they just don’t remember. My mother-in-law usually makes it for us in the winter. One day Gavin said, “Dad, can we make lasagna?” to which I responded begrudgingly, “Yes.” Then came the plaguing question of when.  “Dad, are we going to do it today?” he would ask. I tried to explain the work involved, but it was still hard for him to understand.

Finally, this past Friday, we had lasagna night. I made my sauce as I usually do, giving it the two hours it needs to cook. I got the meat ready and added it to the sauce. I did cheat a little, though, by getting the ready-to-bake noodles. Since the kids were all interested in making it with me, I set up stations so that everyone could help. Abby and Gavin made little lasagnas, and Jacob and I worked on the big one. Gavin was so excited, but yet critical because his lasagna didn’t look exactly the same as the one in the show. I told him that it was partially because he made a little one. That just meant he wanted a piece of the big lasagna so that it looked the same.  

Gavin knows he can ask me for something, within reason, and I will try and fulfill it. I may even fulfill it in a better way than what he asked for, like by being able to make his own personal lasagna. If I were in the pattern of not fulfilling requests, there would be no need to ask, or annoy me about when it will happen. Gavin was confident I would fulfill his request, even if his pouty face or repetitious words weren’t displaying that message leading up to lasagna day. On lasagna day, my words were confirmed, and so was what he has come to know about his dad.

Jesus is even better than that. He fulfills exactly what He says and always takes care of His children. When Jesus opened the door up for prayer and constant communication with God, we got the chance to talk to Him at any moment. The more we learn about Jesus the more we know and see how He fulfills His promise in our lives. We pray with expectation and anticipation that God will provide. As God refines us through His Word, our expectations and anticipation are rarely disappointed. And if we are disappointed, perhaps we should take an honest look into our hearts, where we might find selfish and sinful desires.

Every day we wake up, we can start our day in dialogue with God. This is an awesome blessing! The world can be such a bleak place, but our dialogue with God reminds us of how Jesus fulfilled exactly what He said, and He will continue to do that in our lives. When we talk about Pray 1, we talk about not forgetting to talk to Jesus during our day. Communication with Jesus is a very important blessing that can easily fall to the wayside in the busyness of life. When we incorporate Pray 1 in our lives, we are able to refocus, and be reminded of Jesus’ deep love for us.

Discipleship Go: Read 1

I make sure I never read something twice. I am just kidding of course, but generally speaking, once I read a book I put it aside. There are always new books to read. There have been books that I didn’t want to end, but yet I hurried though them because of the excitement I felt when reading each page. I have my favorite authors and anxiously wait for their new books to come out. Yet, despite these exceptions, reading is a chore for me and not something I usually look forward to doing. So, in this series when we say Discipleship GO: Read 1, I know for me it means I have to set reading plans, find Christians books, and find a system to keep me on my Read 1 path.

This whole series has been about finding the passion and excitement of being a disciple. Yet, I would be dishonest if I didn’t admit that some of these are challenging to get passionate about. Sometimes Discipleship GO just means putting systems in place and taking steps to grow in these areas. One important step in Read 1 is setting a standard from an early age. My family is by no means perfect, but we try to read the Bible with the kids before we say bedtime prayers. We read from an age-appropriate Bible. We started with a simple, short one, and now have progressed to a newer Bible that has questions for the kids. Yes, there are days when I am tired and we skip the Bible and just do prayers, but we try and keep this in our routine.

This year Jacob is in second grade and has to read for 15 minutes every day. At first this was annoying. He would sit next to me and ask about every other word. Honestly, I was struggling with how to do this with him when I felt like there was always something else I could be taking care of in my house. Those 15 minutes seemed like a long time. But since the beginning of the year, Jacob has come into his own. He sits down and reads by himself now, keeping track of what he reads on his reading log. At least 3 times a week he seems to read the Bible. I bet his teacher is thinking to herself, “Of course, the pastor’s kid is reading the Bible for his reading log.” The truth is, he chooses to do it – on his own. He just quickly grabs the Bible and starts reading, no prompting from me. I’m thrilled he chooses to do this on his own. This is where & why the steps of Read 1 are important to me. Taking time to intentionally think about how to incorporate this into our daily lives means it is now something our kids, or those who are close to us, find as normal and perhaps they’ll start doing on their own too.

This weekend we continue our discipleship series talking about taking steps to put God’s Word in our life every day.  That is what Read 1 is all about. We want to regain the passion in our discipleship walk, so how can this be done when we read and reflect on God’s Word? Also, what is unique about God’s Word as compared to other books?  For starters, it is powerful, unlike any other, and one we’ll want to read again and again.

Discipleship Go: Love 1

Last Saturday was a very full of day for me. I had many people on my agenda to Love 1. To be honest, it started the night before when Mindy and I hung out together after the kids went to bed. It’s our normal Friday routine. Sometimes we reflect upon the week, sometimes we watch a show, and sometimes the week has just been too long and we head to bed early. Our date nights are cheap, but important. As I write this blog, I can’t forget the person I have been blessed with and called to love first. Ministry is busy, and at times I can forget to love my spouse as the first part of Love 1. My wife is busy serving others also, and at times, the day is so full of loving kids and families that it is overwhelming. Friday nights can be a haven for both of us.

Saturday morning I woke up early and headed to a cross-country meet with the boys. It was in St. Charles (blah)!  My mid-county arrogance and annoyance was kicking in with having to drive to the other side of the universe (well, at least to the other side of St. Louis). Thankfully, the boys’ race was first, which meant they would be done in plenty of time for the next thing on my agenda. Jacob and Gavin raced together this time. Jacob was in first place most of the race. As he started to loose his lead in the final part of the race, I could feel my adrenaline kicking in wanting to help him. He still finished second. It is so incredible to see how fast he is, especially since none of this skill came from me. After he finished and my heart calmed down, I knew I needed to cheer on Gavin as well. Gavin was near the end of the pack. To be fair, he is a Kindergartener who snuck into a first and second grade race. It was certainly a different feeling watching him than watching Jacob. When I got home Mindy pulled me to aside and asked if I cheered for Gavin too. I answered yes, but then had to ask myself if I had cheered for him enough?  Was I Loving 1 to both of my sons?

I then turned my attention to the funeral, which was now only a little over an hour away. I transitioned from Word of Life clothes into a collar, and began rehearsing all the stories in my head and processing how all of the readings went together. I began thinking about the husband and his two sons and the other people who would be there, and preparing my heart to lead people in worship and help them see Jesus. I was asking Jesus how to Love 1 with everyone I came in contact with at the funeral.

After the funeral, I headed home to try and rest. As my eyes closed, my head began preparing for the wedding I would officiate that evening. I began thinking through the story of this couple and how their relationship developed. I was also thinking through the history of Jeremiah (from the Old Testament), and picking out elements to explain in the message that would help make the connection between God and His relationship with the church, and how that is similar to a couple who is getting married. At the wedding, I was sitting on a bench deep in thought when the groom came up to me. He almost had to shake me to wake me from my thoughts and preparation; I was so entrenched in making sure I was (& would be) Loving 1 with the bride and groom and everyone I came in contact with.

Thankfully, not every Saturday is like this one. But on those busy days, I am deep in thought about each relationship even more than a normal day. My deep thought is actually an informal regular dialogue with God. Recently, some people have asked me to define intentional relationships. That got me thinking about one of the greatest issues in the church—that often times once we learn something, or sanctification (which means to be made holy) has done its work, we move on. We unconsciously assume that others can grasp the ideas in our head, or pick them up just because they see glimpses of us modeling them. The stories I share aren’t just pastoral duties; they are stories about what God has taught me about being a disciple of Christ. If you are a businessman or woman, you could have similar thoughts on how to do your job and yet care for people. As a parent, it is undeniable that our thoughts are on our kids’ care, guidance, and discipline.

In week 2 of our Discipleship GO series we focus on Love 1. How is this different from intentional relationships, which is a part of our values at Mt. Calvary? It isn’t any different! Values help describe characteristics we hold up as body of believers, but Discipleship GO is all about acting on them. Love 1 is asking, “What does it look like when we act on the faith and values built in us?” In Romans we hear Paul share with us how to care for those who are weaker. We are all weaker in different moments, and we all need love. Jesus and His work exemplifies Love 1. We now share Love 1 by loving those people in our lives. It can look different in any and every situation, but as we open ourselves to dialogue with God (who created all mankind) and listen to Him, He will guide us to how we can love His people.